My Brother’s Father

I guess technically he’s mine as well. Him and my mom divorced when I was still a baby. I saw him only a handful of times while I was growing up. I met him and my step mom 8 years ago when I was 28.
I really like her a lot. I enjoy talking to her and it helps sometimes to talk to her because she gives pretty good advice. Him… not so much. I have found in dealing with him that he would rather walk 10 miles to tell a lie then 10 feet to tell the truth. Because of this I don’t talk to him a whole lot or have much to do with him other then a few conversations here and there.
Over the years I have been prepared on several occasions to banish him from my life. I don’t because I love her and because I keep thinking maybe he will change. I think I have finally found my breaking point.
A couple years ago I got arrested while they were in for a visit. The kids told me that he got mad and threw a fit when he found out. He got kind of hateful when I got home and I just had to tell him it wasn’t about him. I didn’t ask him for any money to bail me out and didn’t ask him for any help other then a ride home once I got out. He later called my brother and got all dramatic with him about it and talked about how pissed he was at me. My brother called and told me about it and we both got a good laugh out of it.
Yesterday I called the step mom and talked to her about Dj being pregnant. She took it good after the shock wore off. Before we got off the phone she said “I’ll call your dad and tell him about it”. I just said ok and got off the phone.
When I got home from work Dj told me that he called her. She said at first he said “Well, are you going to tell me about it or do I need to guess?” She said “I don’t know I guess you can guess.” then she just got quiet. He came back with “So you’re going to make me guess.” After that he told her that he still loved her and talked to her for just a few minutes. She said over all it was a decent conversation.
Later in the evening my brother called me to ask if I had heard from his father. I said nope but Dj did. He said well fair warning he has called my house and my cell a lot today. He said he finally answered the phone and the man had the balls to be pissed about it all. Said he don’t agree with it at all and it just ain’t right. My brother said he ranted and raved for quite awhile. Then came the part that almost broke me down. His exact words: “Your sister was scared to call me herself and tell me.”
I wish so bad he would call me and say that kind of shit to me. I can’t very well call him because it would just start too much trouble for my brother.
Why does everyone have to make this about them?
One more negative word out of his mouth and I swear I won’t be able to hold it anymore. I will cut him quick and he won’t even know what hit him!

Published in: on July 11, 2008 at 5:00 am  Comments (6)  

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6 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Even though your dad felt he couldn’t talk to you..
    I think it’s pretty awesome that he was so cool with your daughter on the phone.

    Maybe that’s a small sign that he’s changing?

  2. That’s a nice thought but I think it just shows how two faced he can be. I knew he would be cool with her on the phone. And he’s my father not my dad. I’ll make the distiction for everyone here pretty soon. 🙂

  3. Yes, I can see him as being two faced – didn’t see that before.
    I’m glad you pointed it out – I have a tendency to see things with a clouded view.

    I’m sorry it’s like that for you. I imagine it can be painful as well as difficult.

  4. Oh, but what I came her to say.. before I saw your comment to my comment, and commented again…
    is that…

    I saw your posting on MissBritt’s blog.. about learning not to apologize for everything.

    And I wanted to tell you that I can relate so well to that!!!!

  5. Honestly I have learned to just say piss on it. Most of the time I laugh about what comes out of his mouth.
    I used to have a friend that would get on to me all the time for saying I’m sorry. For which I would just turn to her and say “Sorry!” LOL

  6. That’s too funny!


    I have a friend now who gets on me for saying sorry… and in turn I say “sorry”. LOL!

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