Me

I think my whole “theme” is gonna become randomness. I can’t seem to string together one coherent thought lately and it’s about to drive me nuts. Usually I like the way my mind works because it doesn’t give me time to dwell on anything. I just happen to want to dwell on things right now and can’t.

  1. I have been feeling sick lately. I don’t think it’s sick in any conventional way. No cold or flu. But a lot of things have been making me literally throw up from just the mere thought of dealing with them. I have had more nose bleeds in the past three weeks then I have had in a long time. I know it’s stress related but until I can just sit down and clean out the cob webs in my brain it ain’t gonna quit.
  2. Why is it that lately everyone that meets me feels the need to “save” me? I have been changing my own diapers for a lot of years now and I haven’t made a mess yet that I can’t clean up on my own.
  3. Along that same line why is it that the very thing about me that attracts people to me is the very thing people want to change about me? I realize I am scatterbrained and more then once I have sat on the side of the road because I forgot to put gas in my car. I’m ok with that, why can’t everyone else be?
  4. I’m also a little worried about me. People keep expecting me to have a nervous breakdown or freak out or something because I just lost my Dad. Maybe there is something wrong with me but then again…maybe I’m the smart one. My Dad was always a very vibrant man. The last year of his life he wasn’t on the go much other then to doctors appointments and such. He was saved and I watched him on his final day with us and I saw him talking to his angels. I know he is in a better place now. How can I be sad about that? Sure I miss him and it kills me to know that I will never have a worldly conversation with him or feel him hug me or hear him tell me he loves me but isn’t that just me being selfish and not wanting to give him up?

I guess that’s about all that is swirling up there today. If not I’ll be back. And by the way…Welcome To My World!

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Published in: on October 27, 2006 at 8:34 pm  Leave a Comment  

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