Let’s All Just Play!

First things first, I owe someone an apology and this is the best it’s gonna get.

I apologize for the comment I made Friday night. I was pissed off and I shouldn’t have said what I said. She is most likely a lovely girl and I was wrong in using her as a way to get at you.
I do not apologize for lashing out. I had a friend in tears and nothing sets me off quicker.

Well, yeah there is. Let me tell you about it.
Actions speak louder then words. You can tell me all day long that your a nice person, that you don’t just mess around and that you are loyal to a fault. This is what I have to say to you: Prove it! I will be the first one to tell you that I like to play around not sleep around. I have proved that time and time again. Don’t tell me you don’t want to hurt any ones feelings and then turn around and show that you could care less about said feelings. If you are just out to play around and put another notch in your belt then by dingies just say so. I would tell you.
That’s all I have to say about that.
Friday night for the most part was completely awesome. Mike…I am really liking the “new you”. Not that the old you was bad, I enjoyed him as well. A friend once told me that she likes to take “a walk in the woods” with people that interest her. By that she means a full out deep, open, honest, non judging talk with these people. You have always been one that I would like to walk in the woods with. You have always intrigued me and I have found you to be a true gentleman. (Deal with it!)
Sorry, got sidetracked. Robin and I had some freaky guy come sit at the table with us. He talked to our boobs for most of the time he sat there. He didn’t really like me. He was digging on Robin though. The reason he didn’t like me, I hurt his ego. I just felt it was only right of me to let him know that he wasn’t going to get anywhere with either of us. I didn’t want him wasting his entire night sitting there with us and then going home alone. There were a lot of hotties in there that he needed to be working on. Poor feller, went home alone anyway. It was funny though. He ran to talk to Robin everytime I left the table and as soon as he saw me coming back he took off again. 🙂
My project status: Moving along nicely. It took a weird turn this weekend but weird isn’t always bad. It was something that I had hoped to avoid but in my intoxicated state of mind my rational thinking was out the window. Guess, I just have to roll with it. That’s what experiments are all about anyway.
Saturday morning I woke up to a hang over. I rarely have those but I did this time. I had to drive to OKC feeling like crap. I got there and took a short nap and was off again. The night wasn’t as wild as it normally is but I certainly enjoyed it. I got the chance to talk to three ladies that I have never really been able to sit down and just talk to and get to know. I found out that I really do like all three of them. One of them could possibly show up down here in the next month or two.
The night ended pretty much uneventfully (nothing wrong with that). I got up Sunday and visited with family most of the day. Then hauled my tired, hung over ass home. I thought I would get to go to sleep pretty early since my kids spent the night with Robin but it wasn’t meant to be. I played host to the first of several come to Jesus meetings last night until 2 am. It needed to happen and I’m glad it happened. Now maybe some of the drama will get out of my life.

Published in: on July 31, 2006 at 5:39 pm  Leave a Comment  

Road Trip!

The actual trip doesn’t start until tomorrow but my adventure starts tonight! After work I am gonna go home and shower and do the girl things, gather up my kids and set out for the big town of Rattan! My ol’ buddy Robin and I are goin to Wranglers tonight to blow off some steam. It’s been a rough past couple of weeks and I can only see it getting a bit worse in the next couple. That’s okay, I can handle it.
I got an email at the beginning of the week from my friends in Oklahoma City declaring Saturday night as girls night out. I really don’t have the money for the trip but I was told to get myself up there and they would take care of the rest. I really do feel loved. These women are awesome women!
It’s kind of a bittersweet trip. I love all my friends and family here and I am always home sick when I am up there, but there is so much less stress up there. I had a great job with a lot of potential for growth. I made great friends up there as well. I always hate leaving them again and find myself in a puddle of tears when I go.
The downside to the job; I had to dress up. Playing dress up is okay for the weekends but when you gotta do it at 6 in the morning EVERY morning it kind of loses it’s appeal. That is one of the reasons I love my job here. I NEVER have shoes on. Yesterday I came to work in my pj’s, hair not brushed and no make up on. (I only did it to prove to my boss that my bare feet aren’t the worse thing that could happen) He hasn’t said anything about my bare feet today. LOL
Okay…I am just rambling now. I really just wanted to say that I am getting the hell out of dodge this weekend. And while I am in OKC hopefully I will find my good mood again and bring it back home with me, if I can make it load up and ride back this far.

Published in: on July 28, 2006 at 3:32 pm  Leave a Comment  

More Random

There is so many things swimming in my brain this morning that I can’t make them all coherant enough to write about just one thing. So…on with the random:

  • My electricity got shut off this morning. It ticks me off because for once I can honestly say, and if you know the story you will agree, it’s not my fault. THEY screwed up and now I’m gonna have to pay for it. Hope they aren’t in desperate need of my $400 anytime soon cause I don’t have it. I’ll be in the dark for a few weeks.
  • There are eyes on me even here. That’s okay though. I know people are reading this because I am getting a lot of page views. I don’t know who you are but just like I said yesterday, I kind of feel bad cause I am one boring bitch.
  • I hope it don’t get stinky around my house. I have water but don’t have hot water. I don’t mind the cold shower thing and as hot as it is hopefully no one else will either.
  • I think what I am gonna do for the next couple of weeks is this: I’m still gonna go out like normal. Instead of letting everyone buy me a beer like normal I am just gonna have a collection jar and when anyone asks me if I need another beer I’m gonna hand them the jar and let them put that dollar in it. I’ll stay sober for once and get the money to pay that electric bill.
  • I have been seriously thinking about attempting to quit smoking. Giving the current state of bitchiness that I have been in the past couple weeks I have to wonder if it’s a good idea to try it now. If you happen to look up in the sky and see a giant mushroom cloud over Valliant some day then you will know that I attempted it.
  • The kids are still alive an healthy. I know this because they have been some what bitchy as well the past couple weeks.
  • I was randomly reading blogs about a week ago. I came across one that had some pictures on it with some places that looked familiar to me. At first I couldn’t place where I had seen them then it dawned on me I had drove by them a million times. It was kind of weird to me cause this person only lives about an hour away from me. The reason for the weird; in all my years of random blog reading I have never come across one that the person lived that close to me. It kind of gives me an odd feeling to read the blog now. It’s like I am looking in the window of a neighbor. (That don’t stop me from reading it though.)

That picture up ^ there. That is all I have to say to everyone and everything that has pissed me off lately.

Published in: on July 27, 2006 at 3:56 pm  Leave a Comment  

Eyes Everywhere!

It has recently come to my attention that I am being watched. Not me specifically but Sharla is being watched. By virtue of the fact that her and I are always together I am being watched as well. Someone around town is doing it and someone at the bar is doing it. All I have to say is this: their life must suck worse then mine cause we lead a pretty dull life.
Most days go something like this: I get up around 7 and get ready for work. I work until about 5 and then go home and either watch tv or just sit and bullshit with whoever happens to be there at that time. I go to bed and start the cycle over again. Fridays and Saturdays include the bar on most weekends where depending on how drunk I get the show might be a pretty good one.
This weekend was a bad weekend to be watched. There was absolutely nothing to be seen. Friday night I played darts with Leon pretty much all night. I went to bed around 4:30 am and got back up around 8. Went to Broken Bow for a little while then home to visit with Billie for a few hours. I took a nap and then started getting ready to go out. After I was ready (and damn I looked good) it was decided that we weren’t going. So, I got unready and me and my daughter and her friend laid in bed and talked for awhile till I went to sleep. I really don’t remember much about Sunday so it must have been uneventful.
Now, see what I’m saying? Whoever is watching must be one bored individual. I almost feel sorry enough for him/her to give them a bit of a show. Nahhh, piss on em, they took it upon themselves to do this so they can deal with what they get.

Published in: on July 26, 2006 at 4:23 pm  Leave a Comment  

Bitch Bitch Bitch

I’ve talked about this before but with the mood I have been in this last week I am gonna do it again. I can’t stand women that do the whole bitch thing then blame it on hormones and such. This week I have been a major bitch to pretty much anyone that got around me. I don’t really have an excuse for it, things have just rubbed me wrong and I’m tired of keeping my mouth shut.
I used to work for a lady that one day she is your friend. The next day she is having a melt down, tears and all. Then yet the next she is cussing you like a dog. It was all blamed on menopause. Yet another girl at the same job would do the same thing and blame it on being pregnant.
I have been pregnant twice, I have had PMS, I am right now in the throws of being pre-menopausel. Now, my pissy ass mood this week, do I blame it on any of those. Hell no! I blame it on the plain and simple fact that I was mad and felt like being a bitch. All of those things have put me in a bad mood before but I never jumped someone’s shit and then blamed it on that. It’s called self control. Use it from time to time.
I have a very good friend that is admittedly a bitch. She don’t blame it on anything other then she wants to be a bitch. I can respect that. She doesn’t use the holy grail of womanhood to make excuses for it. All I really want to say here is this: If you want to be a bitch then by dingies you be the best little bitch you can be. But, please, quit freakin blaming it on anything other then what it is… YOUR A BITCH!!!

Published in: on July 21, 2006 at 9:12 pm  Leave a Comment  

Dryer Balls

I went to Wal Mart last night. I was just roaming around enjoying the A/C and came across these little blue spikey balls. They are supposed to replace the fabric softner sheets you put in the dryer. They are simply called dryer balls. This has amused me to no end.
“I’m heading to the store, you need anything?”
“No, but you can use some dryer balls!”

Published in: on July 19, 2006 at 4:38 pm  Leave a Comment  

I Have No Snappy Title

I don’t think I met my exceptional person Friday. Unless you count the lady at McDonald’s. I have been going to the same one for about two months ordering the same thing and then having to take it back and go thru it step by step so they can get it right. Normally I would have quit going there but it’s a simple order and I wanted it done right the first time for a change. Well, Friday the lady that took my order got it right the first time. Maybe she was my exceptional person. I do have a lot of exceptional people in my life but this was supposed to be a new one. Guess I’ll just stick with the ones I have because, well, I fear change anyway so I might as well not try and add a new one.
I did manage to not have the “why don’t you like me?” talk this weekend. But, now I have to ask a certain someone why he don’t like me anymore. I seem to have gotten left out of the Cowboy Koolaid mix this weekend. You know who you are so…Why don’t you like me?

Published in: on July 17, 2006 at 8:16 pm  Leave a Comment  

An Exceptional Day!

Things are freeing up — a window of opportunity is opening wide, so climb on in! Someone exceptional is about to enter your life, but first, you have to open your mind and heart. After all, how can anything new enter if you’re still holding onto people and attitudes that hold you back?

That is my horoscope for today. I am kind of excited about it. How often do exceptional people come into your life? It doesn’t say a good person, or even a great one. I’m talking about full on exceptional!
The only real problem so far with this exceptional person is; Sharla and I are BOTH supposed to have one enter our lives today. I am hoping we don’t get our people confused cause then neither of us will have an exceptional person. If she gets mine and I get her’s that could be disasterous. Or what if we end up having to share our exceptional person. Crap this is just way to much pressure!
I will let ya know how it all goes on Monday!

Published in: on July 14, 2006 at 7:40 pm  Leave a Comment  

Complete Random-ness

* A bird in hand is worth two in the bush. What the hell does that mean?
* I do not need to post when I am really sleep deprived because frankly I confused myself with that last post. (However, I mean every damn word of it!)
* My ex husband has suddenly started defending my choice to go out on weekends. That actually means a lot coming from him.
* I re-pierced my belly button last night…It hurts like hell today.
* For some reason people have decided to “just drop by” the house at odd hours of the night just to say Hi. And that’s about all they do.
* I really need to get my grass mowed. It’s almost just right for bailing.
* The parental units are bound to stumble upon this eventually (if they haven’t already and just haven’t said hi) so I might need to start putting a couple kid updates in here. I hear they like to know that the kids are still alive and kicking from time to time.
* The kids are still alive and kicking.
* I miss Billie.
* The electric company is sticking it to me because of a mistake they made. It’s a good thing I’m not scared of the dark.
* This was heard in my house last night: “There just aren’t enough holes to stick it!”
* Just heard this out of the other office: “I just need to know what hole you stuck it in.”

Published in: on July 13, 2006 at 6:53 pm  Leave a Comment  

Blah, Blah, Blah!

This page has been sitting here open for 3 hours now. I can’t think of anything I just really want to say. I could ramble about how rum dumb I am today. Sharla had a good night last night and woke me up around 1AM to talk to me about it. By the time we got done talking it was time for work. I am currently hooked up to a caffeine drip. In about ohhh 3 hours I will be in my bed out cold where I SHOULD have been instead of up chatting thru the night with her.
I do have to say though…I kind of like middle of the night talks with people. Things that you hold in during the day tend to come out and you can really have some good talks like that. (Yes, there really are some things that simply rattle around in my head and never come flying out. It’s usually the things that I think will get my ass kicked. )
Okay… since I have been awake on and off since yesterday I’ve had a lot of time to think about some thing that’s been on my mind. I’ve said it a million times since my divorce. I’m just not sure another relationship is what I want right now. The relationship topic has been coming up more and more lately and I am starting to question how I really feel. I think I might just be ready to jump back in and go for it.
Now, that being said, I’m not looking to get serious with the first guy that asks me out. I think I am just at the point where I am more open to considering it. I have been divorced now for a year and a half. He’s remarried and happy and I can honestly say NOW that I really am happy for him. So, what have I been waiting on? Nothing really, just haven’t had the want to.
Okay, here’s my dilemma; I currently have two guys asking me to give them a chance. I don’t know a lot about either of them but both seem to be nice and not freaked out psycho stalkers. I hold no illusions to the fact that I will find the man of my dreams in a bar. I usually only go to dance and play around then go home alone. (My choice… well most of the time.) But, here again, why not give them a chance. I have known one of them a little longer then the other and probably a little better but why give one a chance I won’t give the other. Crap he might have finally got tired of asking and gave up on me.
Here’s the deal… we can’t really talk in the bar. The bar is the only place I really see them. For the next few weeks I can’t go out cause my kids and I are pretty booked up. I don’t have a phone and at the moment can’t afford one. So, that leaves me inviting them over to my house. Not entirely sure I’m cool with that just yet. I mean what if I get to know them and absolutely hate them. They now know where my house is and can easily come by when I piss them off and gut me in my sleep. Okay not sure that would happen but who knows I am good at making jumps that even Evil Knievel couldn’t make.
Oh HELL!! If I’m just gonna end up hating them and them hating me why bother. I won’t do the dating thing… no one gets a chance. All I have to say is “Can’t we all just be friends?”
Edited to add: I kind of feel sorry for the guy that has the misfortune to catch me. I wouldn’t want to put up with my dumb ass.

Published in: on July 12, 2006 at 9:58 pm  Leave a Comment